Sometimes I wish I was one of those people who gets ahead in life while being a smartass.
To clarify, it’s a certain cut-to-the-quick wit that can sometimes be perceived as mean or wicked. It never gets me anywhere I want. In my 20s, I decided that if I had to choose between clever and kind, I would be kind. And I try not to bring out dirty laundry publicly.
But I watched 2 shows last night..
One called Everything is Copy about writer Nora Ephron and one being Carrie Fisher’s Wishful Drinking one woman comedy show. (Both fascinating portraits of these amazing women.)
But, damn, those bitches let everyone have it! And they were SUCCESSFUL with that shit. I’m sure they experienced fall out, too. I don’t believe it’s my path to be like that, but sometimes it feels like fun. There is an inner bitch in me that would love to just FLATTEN people when I feel like it. But, like mentioned above, it’s never been received well… she can be taught!
What I have learned is that there is still amazing cleverness and humor to be had, even when one weeds out the cleverness that cuts. If you have a habit of choosing cleverness that cuts, reformation is possible. It’s a practice. You won’t be successful 100% of the time in the beginning.
When you choose the path of kindness, it also doesn’t mean that you will never be clever. You may feel clever less at first, but there is a flower in it:
Your cleverness will have a beautiful safety that people will want to be around.
If you lack impulse control on these things, start a meditation practice. Meditation brings out the Witness part of our larger selves. It lengthens the space between the stimulation and response. It allows for greater and more divine choice.
I got really inspired when I imagined what the world would be like if we all chose kindness over cleverness. Can you imagine that? Take a moment. Again, remember that choosing kindness does not eradicate clever humor. It refines it. It alchemizes it, turning base metal into gold. Far more valuable.
One of my favorite books is The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. The First Agreement is Be Impeccable with Your Word. This is a deep path if you choose it. It’s not easy. Our world is rife with gossip and nastiness. I have had to recommit over and over. But it’s so worth it. Our words are magic. What kind of magic do you want to practice?
“The word is the most powerful tool you have as a human, it is the tool of magic. But like a sword with two edges, your word can create the most beautiful dream, or your word can destroy everything around you.” -Don Miguel Ruiz
A great article on The First Agreement can be found here.
If you feel called, I’d love to support you in transforming your life with the power of your word using Energy Alchemy.
If you would like to begin a meditation practice, but need some support, I also offer one-on-one Meditation Sessions. It can be very powerful to meditate with another person. First of all, if you have a time commitment to another, you are more likely to stay committed to it. (In this case, there is also a money commitment that will keep you to it!) Second of all, there is an incredible alchemy that occurs, as Jesus said, “whenever two or more are gathered in my name”. Perhaps you have felt this before. It’s powerful.
Choosing kindness over cleverness is a beautiful path towards Heaven on Earth. The more you choose it, the more your life will transform. This transformation does not depend on the entire world making this choice. Your choice alone will transform your life. And you may bring the rest of the world with you. Here’s to Heaven on Earth.
I’d love to hear from you. Please share you experiences with this practice in the comments. Bless.