I may be almost ready to do practical things again. I have been bored with practicality and shunning it because I couldn’t even. I haven’t even been posting here. I’m coming to terms with the possibility that my flow may not fit into any sort of “business model”.
I am often stuck between… am I mystic or an entrepreneur? I suppose I could be both. But the mystic doesn’t really feel drawn to “work”, if ya know what I mean. The human does feel drawn to being able to pay bills, even if not really interested in the actual system behind them. Hrmph. It does feel good to use my skills to be of service to other humans. I enjoy that.
I’m letting myself feel vulnerable here and just write from the heart, as I sometimes do on Facebook, but not usually here. It feels like perhaps there is something of value to this type of entry. We shall see. Shout outs to Inok Alrutz and Shanti Zimmerman for inspiring me more in this direction
I’m starting to feel better physically after a bout with Candida. I took an interesting route to healing. I only did what made me happy, whether it was a “cure” (like a sauna or essential oils) or just lying about watching videos or going out to eat instead of cooking.
I haven’t been following the candida diet, as I have always been urged to do religiously. But it felt like another prison. It felt overwhelming, which is part of what brings candida on. I read an entire book in the past few days, which is massive for me. Gabor Mate’s When the Body Says No. It’s all about how our repressed emotions cause our illnesses. So, I decided not to repress. Just let myself be. Exactly as I am. Breathing into that liberation.
I did slow way down on coffee and wine. But I didn’t completely stop because I don’t want to. I already knew coffee was the main “bad guy” for my system, and a friend’s muscle testing confirmed this. And my life seems to confirm this yet again. Oh coffee… I’m in love with the bad guy. Hahaha.
I’ve been super lethargic and just wanting to rest a lot. So, that’s what I’ve been doing. Maybe today some practical things will be done today. Time will tell. I’m doing this. Is it practical? I don’t know. I’m just doing it. Letting highest excitement and inspired action rule. I am learning more and more to trust that if I am not ready to do something, it will get done in it’s own time.
“Nature never hurries, yet all is accomplished.” -Lao Tzu
I love how when surrendering to inspired action, I am suddenly just doing something and it is often done before I even think about it. My body almost moves on its own accord. Ease and grace. And so it is. Bless.
Please share in the comments what your experiences are with inspired action. This is something I’m super passionate about and always experimenting with. I’d love to hear how it goes for you!
This post is my version of hanging my artwork on the refrigerator. Look! I made this! I might hang it on the refrigerator, too.
More than that, I wanted to share my process with you today. It felt very magical and very like LIFE, in general.
It is my rational mind’s understanding and desire to do some physical exercises shortly after waking. This “makes sense”. I can “get it out of the way”. It’s more likely to get done and frees up the rest of my day. I like doing daily exercise. I like the way it feels. I like what it does for my body.
But I am also dedicated to following my highest excitement in each moment. And this morning, my coloring books were really calling me. So, I decided to go for it. It had been a while. It somehow felt important. Well, after breakfast. Breakfast felt the most important.
I have three coloring books right now. I picked up the first one, somehow knowing the right mandala to color was not in that book. I looked through it anyway. I was right. I knew the right picture would somehow just grab me. I was almost through the second book when I began to wonder when I would be grabbed. And then… Bam! It seemed to almost move on the page. That’s the one. Inspiration. Inspiration feels so good.
I opened my crayons and this lovely purple color immediately called to me. Ok, that’s the basis for this picture. And I picked out 2 more crayons, thinking I would use that palette. The third was a delicious mauve that I just fell in love with as soon as it came to me.
For me, coloring is a process of listening and uncovering. What is this calling for? What does this want to be? It’s not so much me imposing my will as listening to the will of the creation. This is a practice I use in most things, most recently with the entire revamp of my home. It’s amazing to be able to apply these same concepts in all areas of life.
That pink just wanted to BE! It felt so soft and gentle and feminine. I wanted to add the purple and the blue, but it just suddenly felt really wrong. I had to listen to that. The little flowers in the center wanted to be green, like the heart of it all. And the silver wanted to be there in the movement that seemed so prevalent. And because there was obviously magic afoot. So, some sparkle felt in order.
I was still tempted to use the purple or the blue for balance. To add something that felt more masculine. To create a container. But my intuition and/or the picture just wanted that pink. And it created the container with the pink. And it gave me the words, “The Power of Gentleness.” The purple was just there to lead me to the pink. That’s often the case in life, too. Good to be unattached to outcome.
While I was coloring, I also came upon Lee Harris’ recent video on The Magic of the Slow Lane. It was so lovely to listen to Lee while I colored. I love his insights and they were full of confirmation of what I had been receiving in so many ways since the beginning of this Mercury Retro.
There is power in gentleness, listening, going slow, allowing.
There is power in allowing process to unfold step by step. My rational mind wanted to plan out the whole picture ahead of time. Sometimes I’m like that. But I kept getting the message that I needed to just do the next thing that was obvious and it would all be more clear as I went.
That has been life in a nutshell lately:
Just do the next that is obvious, and it will all be more clear as you go.
That idea can also be stated as following your highest excitement. Such a whole new way to be. Many of us are being indoctrinated. It can be scary when we want the safety net of knowing. But creation doesn’t always know. I did not even know I was going to be writing all this. But it was revealed step by step. When we trust the process, we can enjoy it more and more.
We are all creators. We are all artists of our own lives. What if we all rightfully saw ourselves that way? What if we took steps to create the beauty we love in each moment in all ways? Wow.
What if we took steps to create the beauty we love in each moment in all ways?