Category: Inspired Writings

Letting Ourselves Off the Hook

I have an event this weekend. I have a to do list in my head for what I THINK I need to do to be successful at this event.

I haven’t done any of the things on my mental to do list. I just don’t feel like it.

I’m playing with the discomfort I feel with not having done these things. I’m playing with the idea of instead, continuing to just do what is making me happy (currently, watching an inspirational YouTube video).

It’s so wild how conditioned we are to follow the shoulds instead of the bliss. My process of getting ready under the shoulds feels heavy and unenjoyable. What kind of result will that bring energetically? Fairly obvious.

I deeply know these things, and yet my conditioning (after years of unraveling it) STILL makes me think I need to follow these thoughts and shoulds.

What if, instead, watching these videos gives me some amazing insight. And also, doing what makes me happy and peaceful just creates a better vibe in me. I will serve so much better from a better vibe. It’s what we all want. It’s what I want. It’s what I am here to activate in other people.

I’m going to let go of the shoulds for the millionth time and do what pleases me. In the end, I may come back around to that list. It may look the same; it may look different. But I will be better. And that will make all the difference.

I invite you to take the time to care about making yourself happy. Take action from that place. What if we all did? Bless.

Thanksgiving

I’ve had a lot of demon sadness showing up this past week. I’ve felt it under the surface, and I have let it surface some.

The body remembers, and this was a hard time of year for me last year. There is also all the junk surrounding this holiday that brings sadness for many of us. Being thankful is something to celebrate. Our country’s history of thieving genocide that is still ongoing is in such sharp contrast to that.

I had plans today that felt special to me. My sweet son became ill, and we couldn’t go. We spent a quiet day at home. I mostly read. But there was some sadness still, under the surface. I have felt sad and sick a lot lately. Searching for the remedies. Doing my best to create happiness.

We have some steep stairs in our house. I have always been afraid that someone is going to take a tumble on them and really hurt themselves.

Tonight, I fell on the top of the stairs. My socks slipped and my feet flew out from under me. I bashed up my forearms and elbows and back. Miraculously, I landed on the stairs and only skidded down one or two instead of pummeling down the entire staircase. I scooted down the stairs on my butt until I got to the bottom and Zane came to see what happened.

I got upset that I had really damaged my body and it would take some time to heal it. And then I decided to not hold on to that idea and just send healing energy to the injured spots. Everything was still working.

Zane said, “what did you come down here for?”

I said, “ice cream.”

For some reason, we both laughed.

I didn’t want it anymore. I’m trying to remember what I was thinking when I tumbled. I like to pay attention to that sort of thing. But I can’t remember now. It was too shocking.

I went into the bathroom to get ready for bed, and the physical pain and shock overtook me. I began to really cry. Serious ugly sobs that helped to cleanse the sadness.

I had always been afraid of someone falling. And there, I had done it. And survived. Maybe I don’t need to be afraid anymore.

I went back upstairs after some hugs from Zane, feeling better for the catharsis. Did I need to fall down the stairs to let the tears of stress and sadness loose? I don’t know. But it did that, and it helped.

I had a “life is short, and I could die in my own house at any time” moment and so I decided to buy myself an ebook I wanted. It’s been good. It’s helping me focus on regaining my feminine power through embracing and creating pleasure.

That fall was a new beginning. I am grateful. And I am grateful for you. Bless.

Dating

​Spend your time enjoying activities you are passionate about. While doing this, you will meet people also passionate about things that matter to you. Some will be attractive to you and vice versa. You will find someone. We are all attractive and magnetic when engaged in our passions. Surrender and the universe will bring it right to you in the perfect timing.

Healing Dis-ease: Self Love

​I just got an email detailing how autoimmunity is a major factor in most disease. 

What is autoimmunity? The body attacking itself when it thinks it has a reason. (but often, there is no valid reason.)

Louise Hay and others have long held that self love is the key to healing.
Doesn’t this make so much sense?

We must stop attacking ourselves from within. And also stop attacking otherselves without. They are really the same thing.
Self love. It’s crucial.

When You Smell a Rat.

When a situation looks ok on the surface, but doesn’t feel right for some reason, it’s not right.

When your spidey senses tell you something is rotten in Denmark, believe them.

When you know, deep down, something is amiss, trust that.

There can be a deep desire in the mind to KNOW exactly what is not right about the situation. Sometimes we can find out. Many times we can’t. It’s ok to trust anyway. It’s ok to walk away. In fact, letting go is often the only thing which eventually brings the deep truth back around. Paradox.

What to do when the not knowing is making us crazy? Be with that. Breathe. Allow yourself to be in the not knowing. Allow yourself to be in the crazy space, fully knowing, you are not crazy.

Trust.