Category: Inspired Writings

No Obligation

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There is a natural human need to be wild. A part of us that just wants to be free in the world as our sovereign selves. To escape the mundane, to evade the usual, to have a wide open road in front of us. If even for just 2 hours. Even if it’s just across town.

There is a part of us that very much needs to not be tied to texts, email, social media, or even the person we love most in the world.

There is a part of us that needs to just feel our selves and the air in front of us with no obligation.

No obligation.

We all need this time. Some of us more than others. We have a complementary need for security, but most people understand and spend their lives in service to the security need.

When do we service our wildness with no obligation?

Understanding the importance of this can help a lot of things. It can help us to not feel guilty when we want to break away from loved ones. It can help us to not feel slighted when loved ones need to break away from us. And I’m serious, sometimes 2-8 hours is enough. But we all need it sometimes.

Taking this need into consideration and allowing the space for it in our lives and relationships can mean the difference between health and implosion.

I don’t have all the answers of how to make this work in your life. The solutions are infinite. Your soul will tell you. I’m writing this as a spark of inspiration, a permission slip to tell you that you are not wrong or bad for wanting to break free sometimes. Our world has become so much more free in some ways and so much more tethered in others. It’s ok to break those tethers sometimes. It’s normal to want that.

You are human.

You are sovereign.

You are divine.

If you feel drawn to more support on this or any other topic important to your heart, book an Energy Session.

Bless.

Have you been told you’re “too much”?

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Many of us have been told we are “too much” or “too intense”. We talk too much, love too hard, speak too loudly, cry too much, and on and on.

I’m here to tell ya that’s simply not true.

The result of being told this from the time we are little (or anytime), is that we tend to shut down. We tend to not express. We tend to let it stay inside.

What do you think happens then?

You guessed it! We end up being MORE TOO MUCH. Because it’s all bottled up.

As this message has been floating back to me from one client and friend after another recently, it’s been really sticking in my mind. I am also one of those people who is sometimes TOO MUCH, especially when it comes to romantic love. (My current favorite wisdom on on being too much in romantic love is expressed in this video from Bentinho Massaro: Directional Love vs. Radial Love.) But this concept can apply to just about any area of our lives we feel too big, too loud, too intense, too too anything.

My dear friend, Hand Analyst Chrisstine Gulrajani, has told me I have what is called a big heart line. One of the things she recommended was that I continue to grow my audience… because I have SO MUCH TO GIVE!

Isn’t this a lovely way to look at it? If you have been considered “too much” in any area… you have a lot to give! What’s the solution? There are infinite solutions of course, but what has been coming to me strongly this week is just what Chrisstine suggested to me:

Increase your audience.

That doesn’t mean you need to start writing or doing videos or even have a blog. But maybe you do. Maybe one or all of those things are a perfect outlet for all you have to give.

What it does mean is that those of us with this issue might need a larger support network. And, in fact, this is true of most people. We need a basket of support. We might need to have a partner or a lover, a best friend, and a number of other friends that we go to when we need to express. And we might need to express things to an audience through any of the above methods or another of your choosing.

The point is, the way you were created is not a flaw.

The point is, you were created just perfectly. If there is more than someone wants, spread it around!

We are social creatures. In our current society, it’s not uncommon for us to become more or less dependent on our partner for most of our social needs. This is not romantic and generally not healthy. We need friends. We need community.

If you’re having a hard time finding the right people for you, stop, take a breath, and ask your angels to bring them to you. Honestly. It can be that simple. Just ask. Open a window of possibility for grace to enter. I bet the right people begin to come your way. And in expressing to more people, your expression becomes more balanced.

Tell us how you feel about this in the comments. If you’d like more support, an energy session may be for you.

Bless.

 

Kindness over Cleverness

Sometimes I wish I was one of those people who gets ahead in life while being a smartass.

To clarify, it’s a certain cut-to-the-quick wit that can sometimes be perceived as mean or wicked. It never gets me anywhere I want. In my 20s, I decided that if I had to choose between clever and kind, I would be kind. And I try not to bring out dirty laundry publicly.

But I watched 2 shows last night..
One called Everything is Copy about writer Nora Ephron and one being Carrie Fisher’s Wishful Drinking one woman comedy show. (Both fascinating portraits of these amazing women.)

But, damn, those bitches let everyone have it! And they were SUCCESSFUL with that shit. I’m sure they experienced fall out, too. I don’t believe it’s my path to be like that, but sometimes it feels like fun. There is an inner bitch in me that would love to just FLATTEN people when I feel like it. But, like mentioned above, it’s never been received well… she can be taught!

What I have learned is that there is still amazing cleverness and humor to be had, even when one weeds out the cleverness that cuts. If you have a habit of choosing cleverness that cuts, reformation is possible. It’s a practice. You won’t be successful 100% of the time in the beginning.

When you choose the path of kindness, it also doesn’t mean that you will never be clever. You may feel clever less at first, but there is a flower in it:

Your cleverness will have a beautiful safety that people will want to be around.

If you lack impulse control on these things, start a meditation practice. Meditation brings out the Witness part of our larger selves. It lengthens the space between the stimulation and response. It allows for greater and more divine choice.

I got really inspired when I imagined what the world would be like if we all chose kindness over cleverness. Can you imagine that? Take a moment. Again, remember that choosing kindness does not eradicate clever humor. It refines it. It alchemizes it, turning base metal into gold. Far more valuable.

One of my favorite books is The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. The First Agreement is Be Impeccable with Your Word. This is a deep path if you choose it. It’s not easy. Our world is rife with gossip and nastiness. I have had to recommit over and over. But it’s so worth it. Our words are magic. What kind of magic do you want to practice?

“The word is the most powerful tool you have as a human, it is the tool of magic. But like a sword with two edges, your word can create the most beautiful dream, or your word can destroy everything around you.” -Don Miguel Ruiz

A great article on The First Agreement can be found here.

If you feel called, I’d love to support you in transforming your life with the power of your word using Energy Alchemy.

If you would like to begin a meditation practice, but need some support, I also offer one-on-one Meditation Sessions. It can be very powerful to meditate with another person. First of all, if you have a time commitment to another, you are more likely to stay committed to it. (In this case, there is also a money commitment that will keep you to it!) Second of all, there is an incredible alchemy that occurs, as Jesus said, “whenever two or more are gathered in my name”. Perhaps you have felt this before. It’s powerful.

Choosing kindness over cleverness is a beautiful path towards Heaven on Earth. The more you choose it, the more your life will transform. This transformation does not depend on the entire world making this choice. Your choice alone will transform your life. And you may bring the rest of the world with you. Here’s to Heaven on Earth.

I’d love to hear from you. Please share you experiences with this practice in the comments. Bless.

If you look into anyone’s eyes long enough, you will fall in love with them.

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I was glancing at someone’s facebook feed with a friend yesterday and saw a familiar face.

“There’s that woman I’m in love with!”

My friend was like, “What?”

(We both know I fall pretty far on the hetero side of the sexuality spectrum.)

So, let me back up and tell the story. The Universe brought together some circumstances that put me in a relationship class a few years back. I say it that way because I did not think I wanted or needed a relationship class. I was at the end of my marriage and exploring some new relationships, but not really serious about anything. I was serious about getting out into my local community and, somehow, this is what presented itself.

The final day of the class just happened to land on my wedding anniversary. I was happy to be out of my marriage, but it was still a bit of a wistful day for me. I decided to go to the class and make the best of it.

One of the final practices was to stare into the eyes of a partner for a long time. I believe it was at least 30 minutes. Some people were in the class with their partners. Some weren’t. I got paired up with another single lady for the exercise.

I don’t remember the details of the time we eye gazed. But I remember feeling totally in love with her at the end of it. Not like, I-want-to-make-out-with-you in love. But just LOVE. I didn’t really know her. But I was feeling like… We should hang out! We should be friends! We might have even said we would. This was back in 2011. Five years ago. I don’t think I’ve seen her again. Maybe once in passing. (Small town.) But the feeling of just LOVING her was SO STRONG. Neither one of us followed up on being real in-person friends. I never felt bad about it. I never “missed” her. But if I ever think of her or see her picture on Facebook, I’m just like, “OH! I LOVE her!” and I’m flooded with such good feelings. Even just remembering it now, I feel those good feelings.

Now, we might think… Ok, that’s interesting. That happened. What a fluke. Well. Here’s the funny thing. Through more Universal machinations, I ended up REPEATING the SAME class! I still had no partner, and at the final class, I was paired up with a man whose partner didn’t make it that night. Now, I knew I was about to fall in love and felt a bit awkward about it this time. I knew his partner and liked her. I had no attraction to him. What was gonna happen? Eek! Well, here goes nothing.

Same thing happened.

It didn’t make me want to be with him. It didn’t make me think we should be together. I didn’t see him as a potential partner. It didn’t make me even care if I talked to him ever again. But, I still just felt so much love when I thought of him or saw him. And this one is funny in a different way, because I DO tend to see him around town. In fact, we ended up getting divorced on the SAME day at the same time. So funny. Total rebonding of our “love”.  I never hang out with this guy. But I do have really good feelings about him and wish him the best.

I’m sure there are lots of studies that have been done on eyegazing. I’m guessing this is not new information to a lot of people. But maybe to some it is. I’m not researching it intellectually at the moment. Just sharing what happened to me experientially. And it’s POWERFUL. It really makes me feel we need MORE of this in our lives and culture and leadership.

What do I feel about it? I feel like we see the essence of a person when we bring our presence to each other through the eye gaze. I feel we see that we are one. We bond. We see the Utter Innocence of the Being in front of us. The Truth of our Utter Connection becomes manifest in those moments. It’s an agape love. Universal, spiritual love. It doesn’t need to manifest romantically, although I imagine practicing it in romantic relationship is a brilliant idea. (Why haven’t I tried this yet? Hmmmm. Good question.)

Actually, that’s a good point. Because I had this idea and so did another woman on my facebook feed. Let’s “use” this to get people to fall in love with us! I don’t believe it “works” to get someone to fall in love with you in that way. It’s a deeper human and spiritual connection, which is always brilliant. But if you already do have that romantic love, I believe it can strengthen your ability to relate from a place of Divine Love and Wisdom. Romantic relationships tend to be the place where most of us get triggered and tripped up the most. So bringing in more compassion, empathy, and divinity is definitely a good idea.

In general, this practice is a little bit taboo in our culture. We don’t just stare into peoples’ eyes for a long time. It makes us uncomfortable. We are not used to that much or that kind of connection. Why do we think that is?  Almost anything that is taboo is likely to bring us deeply into our power as divine beings having a spiritual experience. These taboos exist because our current culture is one that is set up to enslave the many and empower the very few. But that is changing. This is a simple but extremely powerful way we can cooperate with that change. Let’s break these taboos and look at each other more. Let’s take the power of connection back. It is so needed.

What if we started all meetings with some eye gazing? What if, in really tense times, we took 15-30 minutes to just stare silently into each others’ eyes before even trying to talk? Imagine how the presidential debates might have been different with this practice. Business meetings. Political discussions. Romantic talks. I predict that resolution would come so much easier. Maybe instantly. There is just a feeling of wanting to be of service to that other person because we see there is no other person.

Please share your experience of eye gazing in the comments. I’d love to hear more. And if you haven’t tried it, try it and report back! Bless.

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